By Bre Nicole J
It’s business nothing personal! Whatever ill feelings you’ve held against someone in the past is completely irrelevant! When you’re building a brand there are a few things you need to ask yourself— is it worth it? Will I make money? Is it beneficial for what I want to accomplish ? Why am I doing this in the first place? How can I make this happen? And what will it take in the process?
Holding a personal vendetta that has absolutely nothing to do with money or your brand is not one of those things you should allow to get in the way. If you inflict pain on someone else because that person hurt you, it’s not going to eliminate the pain you are currently feeling. The hurt will still be there . Don’t be the hurt person, who hurt you .
Most of the time the reason we are holding a grudge or wrongdoing against someone is because of another person. When it comes to being a woman, sometimes that other person, who is the cause of all the drama is a guy.
Back in college there were a few women who disliked me due to my connection to a guy that I was dating. There was always a new rumor being dished out about who I was as a person and my integrity because of my relations with him.
Of course many of the women who had their opinion about me were also women he had slept with. Others were just so unhappy about their own life that they tried so hard to make my life miserable with their personal beliefs about me.
I couldn’t let their opinions and grudges define my brand and define me. These women weren’t paying my bills, weren’t cashing my checks, and weren’t helping me build my brand or career so their opinions about me were invalid.
You have to remember what people say about you and how they feel about you, is really none of your business!
As career driven women the grudges held against other women and men can get in the way of making rational and logical decisions when it comes to gaining profit.
Of course you don’t want to do business with someone you don’t trust or has a hidden agenda, but if it’s about helping your brand as well as someone else’s brand, all personal issues on who screwed who back in high school and college, should get thrown out the window. No one cares anymore, except you.
It happened and it’s over and done with. Do not allow it to affect working with someone who may bring a lot of good to your business. No need to get revenge or angry about the past, it already happened and it ain’t nothing you can do about it.
If you inflict pain on the person who hurt you, it’s not going to eliminate the pain you are currently feeling. The hurt will still be there . Don’t be the hurt person, who hurt you . Allowing the actions of another person to control how you handle and run your business, or how you participate as a team member at a company takes more of a toil on you than the person who actually hurt you.
Remember bitter Betty’s never win in the end. Like Beyonce’ said in ‘Formation’ — ‘always stay gracious the best revenge is your paper’.
Here are a few ways to let go of past wrongdoings!
Take great care of yourself always (your mental /emotional well being, physical, and spiritual)
Read positive daily affirmations
Get an accountability partner who will tell you the right thing to do —who is the good angel on your shoulder not that trickling little devil
Substitute negative thoughts with positive thinking
Write a list of all of your best positive qualities
Surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself
Treat yourself to nice things
Write a letter about how that person made you feel and burn it
Keep writing the same letter if you keep having those same negative thoughts about how that person made you feel and then burn it once more
Fall in love with a better you
Remember that forgiveness is a daily process and we have to do it every day with cleansing and renewing our minds and hearts
Bre Nicole is a multimedia personality working in front and behind the scenes. She founded a blog site called insidethegirlsroom.com, the fall of 2014, while studying Family Life Education and Communications at Western Michigan University. During her senior year at WMU, she received a full ride scholarship at Specs Howard School of Media Arts for Broadcast Media. Bre Nicole has also interned with Oh So Radio as a blogger, hosted on a TV show called 7 Mile 2 Belle Isle Reloaded and was a production intern for the Blaine Fowler Morning Show at 96.3 WDVD (Cumulus Media Detroit). She is currently an on air radio personality for Power96.5 in Lansing,Michigan. Media is just the tip of the ice berg when it comes to Bre Nicole,this young,ambitious 24 year old has also interned as a suicide prevention specialist and has a nonprofit agency called Saving Our Sisters that focuses on breaking abusive family cycles and prevention of domestic violence and sexual assault in our communities, while providing workshops on emotional well being and healthy relationships.